You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Shame is for Republicans.
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