i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
