chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
