I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
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At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
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