I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
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