I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize