hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Go christen that room with your naked body.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
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