Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i may or may not be watching the land before time
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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