His pubic hair was longer than his dick
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.