People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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