the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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