I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.