Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in