What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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