I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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