I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
