you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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