There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
