therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I need to calm my uterus...
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
