i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
