Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I bet he comes in French.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Randomize
