Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(614): View more from Ohio

I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.

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(614): I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts. http://tfl.nu/c8t0

Replies (36) Good night (852) Bad night (2937)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.

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(612): I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks. http://tfl.nu/pli4

Replies (27) Good night (3982) Bad night (938)
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(253): View more from Washington

I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.

(281): View more from Texas

No. Just liquor. Time's no good.

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(253): I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time. (281): No. Just liquor. Time's no good. http://tfl.nu/1yv7

Replies (14) Good night (2895) Bad night (874)
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(774): View more from Massachusetts

What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling

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(774): What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling http://tfl.nu/ijkr

Replies (21) Good night (954) Bad night (6046)
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(765): View more from Indiana

After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.

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(765): After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself. http://tfl.nu/i4wo

Replies (14) Good night (1785) Bad night (5755)
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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.

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(832): Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me. http://tfl.nu/x609

Replies (5) Good night (2499) Bad night (779)
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(714): View more from California

I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.

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(714): I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later. http://tfl.nu/riev

Replies (17) Good night (1911) Bad night (2326)
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(951): View more from California

We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.

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(951): We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question. http://tfl.nu/23so

Replies (13) Good night (1877) Bad night (616)
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(910): View more from North Carolina

Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.

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(910): Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook. http://tfl.nu/qwbp

Replies (11) Good night (1284) Bad night (848)
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(760): View more from California

I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.

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(760): I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day. http://tfl.nu/8ipd

Replies (4) Good night (3102) Bad night (681)
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(760): View more from California

Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.

(619): View more from California

I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.

(760): View more from California

I referred to the cat as amicable.

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(760): Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat. (619): I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race. (760): I referred to the cat as amicable. http://tfl.nu/ls44

Replies (4) Good night (1508) Bad night (501)
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(856): View more from New Jersey

the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there

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(856): the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there http://tfl.nu/b4jk

Replies (4) Good night (775) Bad night (1158)
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(503): View more from Oregon

THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT

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(503): THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT http://tfl.nu/3zvj

Replies (13) Good night (560) Bad night (1543)
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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?

(814): View more from Pennsylvania

like...quickly.

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(814): Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision? (814): like...quickly. http://tfl.nu/6pc5

Replies (3) Good night (719) Bad night (325)
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(248): View more from Michigan

and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs

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(248): and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs http://tfl.nu/ioh9

Replies (4) Good night (648) Bad night (218)

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