Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
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