That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Randomize
