pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
