i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
