yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
