It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
