It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
