The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize