Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
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