apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize