And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I'm too high and old for this...
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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