he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Randomize