The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
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