My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
