super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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