I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
