Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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