Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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