OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
As shirtless as possible
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
