Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(913): View more from Kansas

Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.

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(847): View more from Illinois

my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.

Fav 97 1989 10869
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive

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(314): View more from Missouri

Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?

(1-314): View more from Missouri

God gave us a 4 year grace period.

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.

Fav 8 4011 1135
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(419): View more from Ohio

when I sang my humps to you I meant it.

Fav 2 3684 1044
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(830): View more from Texas

I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that

Fav 1 559 470
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?

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