bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Another day, another engagement, another cat
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?