I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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