I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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