Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
You're a waste of cheezeits
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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