it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
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