remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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