I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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