I think my vagina is haunted
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
