Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
