The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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